From Satire to Silliness, this week's Sidelines by Mike Ashley


By Mike Ashley

DON’T DISCOUNT THEM OUT: I’m afraid that Appalachian State and Toledo might be very disappointed in the payout at the Dollar General Bowl.

STAG BOWL: When exactly are the Reindeer Games, and Joe Buck has to be on the call, right?

CARSON WINCE: Going to be interesting to see how much of the Eagles’ high-flying success was predicated on their MVP QB and how much was team-wide improvement.

THROWING IT OUT THERE: One of the more interesting ideas I’ve heard lately is former Washington TE Chris Cooley opining that the NFL should consider fining quarterbacks that lead receivers into big hits. DBs and their accountants are all in favor.

ROCKY BOTTOM: Somehow letting Phil Fulmer be AD at Tennessee is like Hoss Cartwright running the Ponderosa.

TIMEOUT FOR TRIVIA: What year did the original-AFL-member Chargers leave Los Angeles for San Diego?

ANTAGONIZING ANALYTICS: With the acquisition of 6-6 Giancarlo Stanton to go with 6-7 Aaron Judge, the New York Yankees should lead MLB in home runs, strikeouts and blocked shots next year. (Pilfered from Sean Welsh of Baltimore)

MIAMI VISE: Sending Stanton away saved the Marlins $25 million, but also saved Miami fans the trouble of going to games, too. 

EARLY LINE: It’s 2-to-1 Supreme Court rules in favor of eliminating ban on sports betting.

NATIONAL INTEREST: In MikeWorld, NCAA rules would be skewed so that Army and Navy football would both be national football powers again. They reminded us again last Saturday that they embody the best of sports and of our country.

DON’T BE THAT GUY: As a public service with fantasy playoffs upon us - Everyone wants to talk about their fantasy team. No one wants to hear about your fantasy team.

THREEDOM TO CHOOSE: With the 3-pointer and it’s leading practitioners dominating the NBA, kind of interesting that the early leaders for the league’s major awards – Giannis Antetokounmpo (MVP) and Ben Simmons (Rookie of Year) aren’t known for that part of their game.

TRIVIA ANSWER: Founded in 1959 with seven other American Football League teams, The LA Chargers beat it to San Diego in 1961, where they resided until this very season. Bonus trivia – those other original AFL teams were the Boston Patriots, Buffalo Bills, Dallas Texans, Denver Broncos, Houston Oilers, New York Titans and Oakland Raiders.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Mike Ashley has covered college athletics for over 30 years. He has worked in the athletic departments at Virginia Tech, Radford University and Marshall University, in addition to freelance work from his Northern Virginia home. Ashley has also worked as a stand-up comic, and has been a regular on many radio stations throughout the Mid-Atlantic Region. His work appears in Terrapin Times (covering the University of Maryland), NCAA programs, Blue Ribbon YearbooksAthlonLindy’s, and on bathroom stalls in major sporting venues. He has also co-authored a book on the golden age of Virginia Military Institute football, “Best Regrets: VMI’s John McKenna and The Lost Age of College Football.” Previously, the Salem, Va., native has helped author books on the New York Yankees, Emmitt Smith, Maryland’s 2002 NCAA basketball championship, and published a book on the history of Radford University.

William Roth