NFL News, Replay Reviews, batting glove blues and LeBron Can’t Lose


By Mike Ashley

WEED RECEIVERS: Retired TE Martellus Bennett’s revelation that “most” NFL players use marijuana means I’m going to pay more attention when announcers say receivers high point the football.

WE CAN WORK IT OUT: Am I the only fan that somehow wishes OKC would trade Paul George for someone named John Ringo? Well, maybe me and Russell Westbrook.

OLD MONEY: Minnesota cornerback Terence Newman, who will be 40 when next season opens, just got a new contract. The Vikings announced they would only use him in buffalo nickel coverage.

EVERYBODY BEATS THE WIZ: Ironically, the NBA franchise formerly known as the Bullets now have a lot of guys shooting their mouths off.

TIMEOUT FOR TRIVIA: How many NBA titles have the Boston Celtics won?

HEY, WAIT A MINUTE: Of the 1,312 calls reviewed in MLB last year, 47.4 percent were overturned. In the NFL, it was 45.3 percent. Yeah, I know. I had to reread it just to be sure, too.

DRIVES ME AT-BATTY: Can someone please design batting gloves that don’t need to be readjusted after every pitch.

CAV NOTS: If LeBron gets THIS Cleveland bunch back to The Finals, a lot of NBA fans just might have to finally shut up about him. And finally realize he’s an atomic-powered unicorn unlike anything the game has ever seen before.

AWWW, PUCK: The Buffalo Sabres won the NHL Draft Lottery and the prize is No. 1 prospect, Swedish defenseman Rasmus Dahlin. Good news/bad news for the NHL’s lowest scoring team.

PHILLY PHILLY: David Akers’ NFL Draft rant could have been more effective if his voice hadn’t gone all Peter Brady.

FROM THE ONION: This week’s favorite headlines – “Is Andrew Luck Fully Recovered From His Quadruple-Amputation Surgery?” Also, “Don Mattingly Yelling At Marlins For Leaving Dome Open With AC On,” and “LeBron James Credits Teammates With Providing 4 Bodies Necessary to Avoid Forfeiture Against Pacers.”

WITH THE 256th PICK: Mr. Irrelevant? That’s what they used to call me on the dating websites.

NOBODY WILL BOTHER HIM: RIP Jhoon Rhee who introduced most of us to Taekwondo. 

TRIVIA ANSWER: Everything has come up shamrocks for the Celtics 17 times, including the Bill Russell-led skein of 11 titles in 13 years from 1957-1969, before ESPN was around to include him in the G.O.A.T discussions.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Mike Ashley has covered college athletics for over 30 years. He has worked in the athletic departments at Virginia Tech, Radford University and Marshall University, in addition to freelance work from his Northern Virginia home. Ashley has also worked as a stand-up comic, and has been a regular on many radio stations throughout the Mid-Atlantic Region. His work appears in Terrapin Times (covering the University of Maryland), NCAA programs, Blue Ribbon YearbooksAthlonLindy’s, and on bathroom stalls in major sporting venues. He has also co-authored a book on the golden age of Virginia Military Institute football, “Best Regrets: VMI’s John McKenna and The Lost Age of College Football.” Previously, the Salem, Va., native has helped author books on the New York Yankees, Emmitt Smith, Maryland’s 2002 NCAA basketball championship, and published a book on the history of Radford University.

William Roth